Who is abusing who and what? Twisted thinking: Not just a Winnipeg issue

Post contains harsh language:

Recently, I began writing in regards to Domestic Violence and Abuse in Winnipeg.

Winnipeg does not have any more, or less of a problem than anywhere else: it just so happened that Examiner.com needed and wanted a writer who knew something about this topic and was somewhat of an 'expert'

Perhaps the Examiner.com had been reading this blog and came to that conclusion. (Thank you Examiner!)
However this writing gig unfolded, is irrelevant...

What is relevant is the information which was gathered (IN LESS THAN ONE WEEK) from the hot topics that hit Twitter, Facebook and top news stories around the globe.

Conclusion: The world is pretty messed up!

'Say it isn't so, Karin!' 

You can find some of the 'news worthy stories' here...

in less than one week we have learned that pedophiles are getting even sicker than ever before- 'Who in the hell writes a book about guidelines for sexually abusing our children?'

We learned that Amazon doesn't allow porn, however they allowed this 'mess' (above link) to be available for purchase on their site.

In writing about Male survivors of sexual abuse and assault after viewing the groundbreaking episode on Oprah we realize that we have a huge gender divide and our thinking about abuse and abusers is pretty damn twisted as well.

Resources available for men are now being addressed and offered more than ever. (thankfully)
The research is showing that woman are abusers as well as men. No kidding? Is that really news???

Have you ever seen a violent woman???  Have you witnessed (or have heard of) a jealous woman's actions? Ever hear of a woman berating and humiliating her partner in public? Ever wonder how she behaves in 'private'...?

Sure, when most people hear about - or talk about abuse, they think 'male- abusing female'
-Not always the case: Males abuse females, other males and children...
Same goes for females...and females can be equally if not more vicious, aggressive and violent

Sad thing is: humans abuse. Period.

Humans use and abuse each other, they do it with their 'positions' at work, at home...they do it with privileges, laws, and in many more areas that we would rather not want to admit, or know about.

In this research in writing @Examiner.com I have also learned some good positive things.

• We are aware of this gender divide when it comes to addressing male issues and there is a lot (now) being done to help males.

•  We are aware that males have been 'sort of left out' from having the same resources and have been treated rather unfairly in a lot of areas: again it appears that there is something being done about that.

• Amazon will most likely be a little more cautious in what they allow to be sold on their site: Amazon has learned something about book titles... and pedophiles.

For me, personally... I have learned that I too, am guilty of thinking that: when it comes to Domestic Violence, or abuse, including child sexual abuse --  my own thinking, automatically has been:
'male abusing female'

The 'Alter boy'

The strange thing about it all is that, even as a young child I believed that if I were a boy- none of 'this' (the abuse) would be happening to me-
I truly believed that boys didn't get abused or treated in the way that I was...

I had believed it so much and so deep at the time that a male 'alter' personality had been created to cope with it all...(one of the most brilliant and common coping skills of the abused child is to create 'alters')

The Alter (boy) was a mean tough son of a bitch- and nothing ever did happen to him!
In fact 'he' protected 'us' -he was strong and powerful as boys and men would be, he never cried, and he stood up for himself...no one fucked with him-- Ever... in any way!

Twisted thinking- but it goes to show how even at a very young age we tend to believe that males are very different from females.

I couldn't be more grateful for the opportunity to be writing over at Examiner... I have learned in less than one week quite a bit about, men, women, children, resources and laws- including double standards, gender issues and what we are doing about all of it.

I am happy to report- that I will be reporting 'a lot more' of everything and that I will be making a little lot more noise than I have been making...

-and reporting and creating more awareness than ever before in many, MANY areas!
Do visit my Examiner page by clicking on this link...if you like what you see- subscribe! 

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Looking forward to hearing from you...

more to follow on coping skills, the cycle of abuse, domestic violence and healing